ADHD Is Everywhere in My Life. Not in Everyone Else’s

Most days, ADHD feels like the air I breathe.

My professional and personal world is filled with ADHD. My social media feed is filled with conversations about ADHD. My bookshelves are filled with ADHD books. Just last year, I read 13 new books focused on ADHD, and there are many more waiting. Research articles, client conversations, conferences, podcasts. In my world, ADHD is everywhere.

And then I step outside that world.

I go to a dinner with colleagues of my spouse, people who are thoughtful, educated, and curious. And I am reminded very quickly that ADHD is still widely misunderstood. Sometimes I hear comments that frame ADHD as a trend. Sometimes it is described as a result of technology, social media, or modern parenting. And sometimes, people are genuinely surprised to learn that ADHD exists in adults at all.

Recently, I wrote a short personal piece on Medium about strategies I use to support my own ADHD. Someone commented that it was the first time they had ever heard of ADHD in adults. That moment stayed with me. Not because it was wrong, but because it highlighted how uneven access to accurate information still is.

So I want to pause and reset the conversation.

Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder, also called ADHD is a neurodevelopmental condition. That means it starts in childhood and is related to how the brain develops and functions. This is not a belief or a trend. It is the current scientific and clinical understanding, reflected in diagnostic guidelines such as the DSM-5-TR.

ADHD is not caused by social media.

ADHD is not caused by poor parenting.

ADHD is not something people acquire because they cannot focus anymore.

ADHD can be identified at any age. In my work as an ADHD coach, I see adults across the lifespan, including clients in their 60s and 70s, who are coming to this understanding for the first time. A later diagnosis does not mean ADHD suddenly appeared. It usually means that earlier in life, the signs were misunderstood, overlooked, or attributed to something else. Sometimes the language did not exist yet. Sometimes the environment masked the challenges. And sometimes people were simply very good at coping, until those strategies stopped working.

It also matters who we have historically looked for, and who we have missed.

For many years, ADHD was seen as something that mostly affected boys, especially boys with visible hyperactivity. That narrow picture shaped research, diagnosis, and public awareness. We now know that ADHD exists across genders, cultures, and backgrounds. ADHD does not look the same in every person. Some people experience more visible hyperactivity, while others struggle primarily with attention, regulation, or executive functioning, often in ways that are less obvious to others. Girls and women are still more likely to be diagnosed later in life, and sometimes are misdiagnosed with anxiety or depression without ADHD being considered underneath. Similar patterns exist across many communities that were underrepresented in early research.

If you are curious about why late diagnosis matters and how it shows up, I wrote more about it on my blog here: ADHD Diagnosis at Any Age: Why Late Diagnosis is Important

ADHD, especially when undiagnosed or unsupported, can have an impact across the lifespan. How that impact shows up varies widely from person to person. Because ADHD affects attention, impulsivity, self-control, and executive functions, it often shows up in daily functioning across work, relationships, health, and education. This does not mean that people with ADHD cannot succeed or achieve remarkable things. It means that everyday tasks and cognitive load can require more effort, support, and intention.

ADHD is often discussed within the broader idea of neurodivergence, a term used to describe brains that develop and function differently from what society defines as typical. ADHD is one form of neurodivergence. It also commonly exists alongside other conditions. Learning disabilities frequently co-occur with ADHD. Anxiety and depression are also common companions. We now understand that ADHD and autism can occur in the same person as well. You may hear the informal term “AuDHD” used to describe this overlap. It is not a formal diagnosis, but it reflects a growing recognition that these profiles are not mutually exclusive.

If you want to learn more from reliable, research informed sources, two organizations I regularly recommend are CHADD and ADDA. Both offer education, resources, and community grounded in evidence and lived experience.

Even when ADHD feels everywhere in my world, it is still unfamiliar to many. That tells me this work still matters. It also reminds me why clarity, accuracy, and compassion are essential when we talk about ADHD.

Sometimes we are refreshing.

Sometimes we are reminding.

And sometimes, we are teaching for the very first time.

All of that still matters.

This is the shortest version of this topic I could write without losing what matters. ADHD is complex, and there is much more that could be explored. I chose to keep this piece concise so it is informative without being exhausting. I will be writing more about ADHD and related topics in future posts. If you would like to stay informed about new blogs and upcoming writing, you are welcome to subscribe to my newsletter.

subscribe to ADHDtime newsletter